SILENT STRUGGLE
MOTHER'S Day is joyous occasion for many, but it can be heartbreaking and isolating time for those yearning for a baby.
With new figures showing that one in eight women experience difficulty getting pregnant, app (Trying to Conceive), has given a voice to those struggling to conceive in a short film called The Silent Struggle.
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From a woman who has endured 2 miscarriages to another that has undergone five rounds of IVF, to an Indian bride dealing with cultural expectations, the film features the diverse journeys of seven women from Peanut’s community.
Adding to the short's emotional nature, it was produced by an all-female crew, who are also trying to conceive.
Speaking about her experience, Danielle Brathwaite explained that she had suffered two miscarriages in a row and decided to stop trying after she realised she needed to grieve her losses.
The 25-year-old from South London said: "We were trying for two years and then we stopped. We have miscarriages back to back so I was just fed up.
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"You don't realise it's an actual death you're dealing with.
"I haven't dealt with death first hand like a family member, so that was my first experience and yeah, it hits really hard."
Meanwhile, Grace Jackson revealed it's been difficult to conceive after her husband was given an infertility diagnosis.
"It was only in September last year that we found out that my husband's got a male-factor infertility diagnosis," she said. "It's not always gonna be the woman that is the issue.
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"I have up days, I have down days, even doing this interview is quite triggering."
The 34-year-old, who is based in North London, admitted she finds it hard to see pregnant women on the tube and others with children as she desperately wants to have her own.
Adding: "When you just get on a tube and you just see everyone has got a baby on board sticker, or everyone in the world seem to just have children."
Michelle Cherrill explained in the film that she suffers from Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, which affects 1 in 5 women in the UK, according to the .
The condition, which affects how the ovaries work, has made it difficult for the 27-year-old to conceive and even more so she feels isolated because of it.
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She said: "I do suffer from Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS). I have quite high androgen levels. I get all kinds of symptoms like facial hair, weight gain, no ovulation, hair loss all those wonderful things.
"I feel isolated a lot of the time, because even in my own culture, we just don't really talk about these sort of things."
Although, Michelle feels she can't fully share her fertility issues with her family, she has found Peanut, the social networking app, a great support.
"When I've met people who are dealing with infertility, or PCOS specifically, you know, we kind of just bond, quickly," she added.
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Aparna Adams, 38, has been trying to conceive for two years and worries that she might have left it too late.
The project manager was painfully honest in how she feels when hearing of her nearest and dearest successfully conceiving.
She reflected: "I've definitely had times where friends are sharing their happy news, and in that moment, you're very happy and it's like, 'that's fantastic news, I'm so chuffed for you' and then in your head it's like, 'can you go away now'."
Meanwhile, Maddie Flint, who is currently 18 weeks pregnant, disclosed her difficult journey to motherhood, one that has taken seven years and now.
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"We have been trying to conceive for seven years," she shared. "We've had five IVFs, two miscarriages.
"Having miscarried two pregnancies, I wasn't ready for the grief that, that would bring with it. Getting your period and realising that hope is gone for another month."
But not everyone felt that they could share their truth, one participant opted to stay anonymous for the video and explained that her culture has made it difficult to share her struggles.
"I'm an Indian person," she said while facing away from the camera. "As soon as I got married the questions came out: 'Why have you not had a baby yet?','When are you having a baby?'
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"I think that's one of the reasons, I've actually got my back to the camera.
"I think it's quite sad that I have to feel that I can't talk to people about it because of my culture and my background."
And although they all agreed they felt a "envious" and "sad" about seeing the Mother's Day hashtag online, they also shared how much help and support Peanut has given them to chat to women in the same situation.
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