FAMILY AFFAIR
I split up my whole family after introducing my girlfriend to my dad – I never dreamed they’d have SEX, mum’s devastated
Scroll down to find out the top red flags to look out for in your relationship
AN EX-BOYFRIEND has revealed how he managed to split his family up after introducing his girlfriend to his dad.
In a deeply personal and heart-wrenching post shared on Reddit, the anonymous user recounted a devastating betrayal involving two of the closest people in his life.
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The post with whether or not to reveal the painful truth to his mother, who has been married to his dad for 34 years.
He wrote: “My parents have been together since they were both 18.
“My mum truly loves my dad, and it would break her heart if she knew what had happened.”
The 25-year-old explained that his relationship with his girlfriend, 22, of two years had seemed perfect.
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The couple had recently moved in together, and everything appeared to be moving in the right direction.
However, cracks began to show when the girlfriend admitted she found their sex life boring and had a “thing for older men”.
At the time, the poster didn’t think much of it, trusting that their love and commitment was enough to sustain their relationship.
Things took a darker turn when the poster’s father, a lawyer, offered to help the girlfriend regain her driving licence, which had been revoked.
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Due to work commitments, the poster left his girlfriend to visit his father's office alone.
He wrote: “Last week, she came home at 3 am.
I work on Dear Deidre- my tips on what to do if you've lied to your love.
“She smelled like my dad’s cologne, was wearing a completely different outfit, and was visibly drunk.”
When confronted about where she had been, she gave a quick excuse, claiming she’d met up with a female pal after seeing his father.
He continued: “I was already suspicious about the whole situation.
“I reached for her purse and saw condoms there, which we haven't even used for a long time now.
My mum has spent her life married to someone who clearly doesn’t respect her
The Reddit user
“Not only that, I took a look at her phone (we know each other's passwords) and she has been sending dirty pictures to my dad's phone.
“After she got out of the shower, I confronted her about everything.”
“She said she was going to tell me eventually but wasn’t ready yet."
The Reddit poster added: "She claimed it had been ‘stronger than her’ to resist an older man and admitted she didn’t feel the same way about me anymore.”
15 Relationship red flags to look out for
Red flags are warning signs that indicate unhealthy or manipulative behaviour. When you encounter relationship red flags, it’s a good time to pause and reflect on the dynamic you really share with that person.
- Overly controlling behaviour
- Lack of trust
- Feeling low self-esteem
- Physical, emotional, or mental abuse
- Substance abuse
- Narcissism
- Anger management issues
- Codependency
- Inability to resolve conflict
- Constant jealousy
- Gaslighting
- Lack of emotional intelligence
- Negatively affecting your relationship with family and friends
- Inability to communicate openly
- Lack of social connection or friends
For more advice and support, is available: "Whether it’s your relationship with a partner, a child, a family member or anyone else - we help everyone to build better relationships."
Faced with this devastating discovery, the poster was torn about whether to share the truth with their mother.
He wrote: “My mum has spent her life married to someone who clearly doesn’t respect her.
“I doubt my ex-girlfriend is the first woman he’s cheated with in their 34 years together.”
In an update, the user revealed that they decided to tell their mother everything, even showing her screenshots of incriminating messages.
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He shared that as a result his mum was going through with a divorce and "staying at my aunt’s house because she refuses to live under the same roof as my dad”.
The user also confirmed they had ended things with their girlfriend immediately and that he had blocked her phone number and social media accounts.
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As for his mother, he added: “My mum’s family and I will support her through this process, making sure she gets to keep the house and forcing my dad to move out.”
The post ended with gratitude for the support and advice the user received from Redditors, both in the comments and through private messages.
Four red flags your partner is cheating
Private Investigator Aaron Bond from BondRees revealed four warning signs your partner might be cheating.
They start to take their phone everywhere with them
In close relationships, it's normal to know each other's passwords and use each other's phones, if their phone habits change then they may be hiding something.
says: "If your partner starts changing their passwords, starts taking their phone everywhere with them, even around the house or they become defensive when you ask to use their phone it could be a sign of them not being faithful."
"You should also look at how they place their phone down when not in use. If they face the phone with the screen facing down, then they could be hiding something."
They start telling you less about their day
When partners cheat they can start to avoid you, this could be down to them feeling guilty or because it makes it easier for them to lie to you.
"If you feel like your partner has suddenly begun to avoid you and they don't want to do things with you any more or they stop telling you about their day then this is another red flag."
"Partners often avoid their spouses or tell them less about their day because cheating can be tough, remembering all of your lies is impossible and it's an easy way to get caught out," says Aaron.
Their libido changes
Your partner's libido can change for a range of reasons so it may not be a sure sign of cheating but it can be a red flag according to Aaron.
Aaron says: "Cheaters often have less sex at home because they are cheating, but on occasions, they may also have more sex at home, this is because they feel guilty and use this increase in sex to hide their cheating. You may also find that your partner will start to introduce new things into your sex life that weren't there before."
They become negative towards you
Cheaters know that cheating is wrong and to them, it will feel good, this can cause tension and anxiety within themselves which they will need to justify.
"To get rid of the tension they feel inside they will try to convince themselves that you are the problem and they will become critical of you out of nowhere. Maybe you haven't walked the dog that day, put the dishes away or read a book to your children before bedtime. A small problem like this can now feel like a big deal and if you experience this your partner could be cheating," warns Aaron.
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