Trust me, toyboys just don’t work, Caroline… an open letter from a celebrity cougar who knows
Outspoken presenter Lizzie Cundy shares her experience of relationships with toyboys
THIS week Caroline Flack, 38, and her younger partner Andrew Brady, 27, took their relationship to the next level as he moved into her home. But can love conquer an 11 year age gap?
Self-confessed cougar Lizzie Cundy – who has dated several younger men since her split from footballer Jason Cundy in 2010 – warns that life with a toyboy has its downfalls...
Dating a younger man certainly puts a spring in your step.
What could be a better confidence boost than a young, fit man lavishing you with attention?
Having previously dated a bloke 15 years my junior, I can tell you that the trouble with a younger man is - because of the age gap - the differences soon start to appear.
The initial attraction can mask the fact that there might not be much common ground and the conversation can start to wear thin after all that hot passion has died down.
The fact that your toy boy won’t know who Duran Duran or Morecambe and Wise are means that some of your references and humour will simply be lost on him.
In my experience, younger men tend to laugh at the dumbest things but if you make a clever joke, he’ll just look at you slightly bewildered.
It can make you both feel very aware of the differences between you and that can be quite uncomfortable at a time when you should be focusing on becoming closer rather than further apart.
Then it comes to meeting the parents. The generation gap is even more obvious when your mum meets your younger man.
It can be really embarrassing when she asks him questions about or makes references to things in her time. Chances are has no idea what she is talking about and why should he? He wasn’t even born!
He might smile, nod and pretend to understand what your mum is getting at, just to be polite, but really he has no idea.
That can make both you and your man feel even more disconnected from each other.
Another thing with younger men is that they don’t know what life was like before the iPhone.
It can sometimes seem as if he is physically attached to that phone. At times, you might find that you’re in the middle of what you thought was a two-way conversation, only to find that not only is he not listening but he is texting, taking selfies and otherwise playing on his phone.
It can be especially embarrassing when you’re at a dinner table with your friends and your man starts to fidget. If that happens more than a few times, it can really start to grate on your nerves.
Your man might also want to spend a lot of time out with his friends. At that age most men are more attracted to the idea of spending time with their peer group than being a couple.
For you, that means an unsettling sense of paranoia can creep into the relationship as you get the feeling that he might be looking at younger women.
That’s where the constant pressure and pain of trying to look as young as your man can take its toll and can actually be quite exhausting. All women want to look good on the arm of their man but it’s much harder when you are that much older and it can take more effort too.
On the other hand, your man might feel that you are slowly tiring of him and that you’ll want to run away with an older, more worldly guy.
This can breed an atmosphere of distrust and suspicion and that’s a real recipe for disaster in any relationship.
It may seem fun to have this amazing young and fit guy on your arm and in your bed, but it can start to irritate when all he wants to do is play on his PlayStation rather than have a proper conversation.
It can also take a toll on you as you constantly try to look your best to stave off the threat of younger women. So my advice is – think twice before getting your toy boy!
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Meanwhile Pamela Anderson, 50, revealed her toyboy lover has been helping her through the menopause.
And sizzling Sharon Stone, 60, couldn't keep her hands off her toyboy boyfriend on romantic day at the beach.
Plus Holly Willoughby was in hysterics over a toyboy loving cougar who was fed up with getting sent pictures of todgers.