Hilarious warning note left for teens as anxious parents jet off on holiday asks them not to ‘out do each other in the f*** up category’
Tongue-in-cheek note urges Katie and Robbie Ewart not to spend money on prostitutes and booze
Before setting on their summer holidays, two anxious parents left a note to their children warning them not to “try to outdo each other in the who can f*** up the most category”
The side splitting note covered four sides of A4 and was attached to a noticeboard in the families Kitchen.
It set out a series of warnings to Robbie Ewart and his sister Katie while they were away.
It urged Robbie Ewart, to tell his “squad” that their log cabin is not a “drug den or a 24-hour bar” and informed his sister Katie that they did not want another visit from Police Scotland about her anti-social behaviour while they were away.
Robbie, from Chryston, Lanarkshire, tweeted an image of the instructions to with the caption: “When yer maw and da are going on holiday and have trust issues.”
The letter, which opens with the loving parent’s calling their children “a**holes” goes onto make a list of simple requests.
'I know you both like to try and outdo each other in the in the "who can f*** up the most" category, so don't feel the need to express yourselves when I'm gone. Bad things happen.'
The note reminds Katie that the family dog needs “feeding everyday just like you” and lamenting that somehow “she is the responsible one”.
The sheet directed at Katie warns: “I don't want another letter from the council re anti-social behaviour or a visit from Police Scotland's finest.
“Look after Robbie because let's face it, the boy's half daft and can barely tie his shoelaces.
“Life can be difficult for him.”
The instructions to 'half daft' Robbie included not spending the money left for them on prostitutes, drugs, cheap booze and pizza.
“Please inform your squad that our log cabin is not a drug den or a 24 hour bar.
“Believe it or not, our neighbours don't like it when one of your amigos drive up and down the street on their s****y wee dirt bike.
“I have left money for essentials, i.e bread and milk, not drugs, Glen's [vodka], mad dug [fruit flavoured spirits], hookers and Dominos.”
But the distrusting parents haven’t left their children to fend for themselves telling them: “If you run out of food, phone Granny Mo.
“She will no doubt bring you a bag of M&S finest cause she thinks yous are sweet and angelic.”
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But the children were encouraged not to panic their elderly Grandmother for anything serious: “'For anything major, phone Grandpa Sean as Granny Mo will panic.”
When Robbie tweeted as photo of the pic it quickly went viral with well over 7,300 retweets and nearly 17,000 likes.
