There’s nothing to be blue about at 5* Welsh resort Bluestone
By the time I was stuck on the outskirts of Reading, the red mist had descended and I would settle for nothing less than THE BEST WEEKEND OF MY LIFE
IT was probably after around 90 minutes of excruciatingly slow traffic on the M4 on a Friday night that my expectations for Bluestone shot up.
Before I set off on what eventually became the automobile equivalent of an ultramarathon, I had been anticipating little more than a relaxed weekend in Pembrokeshire with the family.
By the time I was stuck on the outskirts of Reading, the red mist had descended and I would settle for nothing less than THE BEST WEEKEND OF MY LIFE.
It wasn't that - but it was good enough to banish the motorway misery from which I feared I would never recover. Yes, Bluestone was a treat.
Set in 500 acres of gorgeous countryside, the "resort" is essentially a holiday park for people who refuse to slum it.
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It comes with a "five-star" rating, which is pushing it if you regularly frequent The Ritz, but recognises the fact that the place is a cut above the usual.
Accommodation ranges from two-person studios to 12-man lodges.
We - a family of four - stayed in a Ramsey Lodge, an upside down house with two en-suite bedrooms on the ground floor and an enormous open-plan living area up top.
One of the resort's USPs is the fact that cars are banned. You park up in the long-stay car park and then either walk, cycle or cruise around in a golf buggy.
For £85 for the weekend, you can tour the entire park - complete with "village" centre pub, shops and reasonably priced restaurants - at a leisurely 8mph.
For us, the park's highlight was the Blue Lagoon swimming pool which, like Center Parcs, is modelled on a "tropical paradise". It's is modelled chock-full of everything wet and wild, from water chutes and waterfalls to a wave machine and a lazy river.
Conscious of the season, Bluestone has also put on a series of events for kids under its Christmasland banner, running until January 1, 2017.
They range from an early morning Toy Chest Breakfast Show (sweet) and the Kingdom Of The Elves adventure story (excellent) to something called the Snow Owl Puppet Show (dreadful). There is also a panto, Aladdin.
Santa is even in situ, holed up in a cosy lodge in the village centre.
To burn off all those calories there are plenty of outdoor activities to do, including "Famous Five adventures" such as den-building and numerous nature trails. Prices range from free to £24 for the ranger activities.
And if it is absolutely chucking it down - as it did on our final day - there is an impressive indoor adventure playground and soft play area, complete with arcade machines. There is also a mini golf course to enjoy.
But one of the most enjoyable things about Bluestone is not something you will find on its activities board or in its guide book.
It's the people - staff and visitors - that make the experience.
Everyone we encountered was just so darn friendly. There really is something warm and welcoming about the Welsh.
I just wish they weren't so far away.
GO: BLUESTONE
A weekend/midweek break at Bluestone starts from £149 based on two-bedroom lodges that sleep four people. Visit for details.