Now Chilcot’s made it clear there was no need for Iraq war, it’s time to prosecute Blair for war crimes
After Chilcot, we can finally see up close what sort of a man Tony Blair really is
I SUPPOSE you’ve got to admire the sheer bloody nerve of the bloke.
Only two days ago, Tony Blair was suggesting that he should be involved in Britain’s negotiations with the European Union.
He had that serious, sincere look on his mug. You remember it from his time as Prime Minister.
As soon as it appeared you knew he was about to tell a porky. Or mislead you, or hide the truth under a barrage of b*****ks.
Now the Chilcot Report into Blair’s illegal invasion of Iraq has been published — and we can see up close what sort of a man he is.
The sort of man he has always been. As if we didn’t know. It is a truly crushing verdict. Sir John Chilcot makes it absolutely clear that there was NO NEED for the UK to go to war.
He makes it absolutely clear that Blair had been determined to wage war a year before the invasion — despite telling Parliament and the public otherwise.
He makes it absolutely clear that Blair deliberately misrepresented the threat posed by Saddam Hussein.
Remember all the stuff about weapons of mass destruction? Deliberately misrepresented.
He makes it absolutely clear that Blair did not give a monkey’s what his Cabinet thought, or what Parliament thought, or what his MPs thought, or what the public thought.
Only what his village idiot mate, George W Bush, thought.
Chilcot also makes it absolutely clear that lives were lost because of bad military planning and that no consideration had been given to what would happen after Saddam had been toppled.
Blair lied — and let everyone down. Our soldiers, the Iraqis, the public.
It is a truly damning indictment of a man who instigated the UK’s most disastrous foreign policy adventure in a hundred years.
And it should be enough to see him prosecuted as a war criminal.
The Iraq invasion didn’t only cost the lives of at least 500,000 Iraqis and 179 British soldiers. It left the country — and the entire region — in the grip of a murderous civil war which continues to this day.
And it led to the jihadi maniacs of IS taking control of vast swathes of the Middle East.
From Aleppo in Syria to Basra in Iraq, the murder and mayhem was made possible by Tony Blair’s absurd, craven determination to stick by Bush.
“We’re with you all the way,” he told the gimp, a year before the invasion took place.
And in this determination, he deliberately misled the country. Time and again.
Since he left office, Blair has spent his time trousering vast sums of money from corrupt and despotic Third World tyrants. He has made himself a millionaire many, many times over. Largely as a consequence of deals which, frankly, stink.
And that stench now hangs over his entire premiership. We waited a long time for Sir John’s report. And an awful lot of the stuff in it we knew anyhow — even if Blair’s dwindling band of admirers tried to deny it. Well, now we know for sure. Beyond all doubt.
With any luck it won’t be too long before he hears a firm knock on the door and the jangle of handcuffs.
Maybe he can try out that sincere, serious expression one more time, in court.
Beeb was stuck in reverse
SO – bye bye, Chris Evans.
The carrot-headed munchkin has been sacked – sorry, made a dignified resignation – from Top Gear.
Hardly a surprise as the only people left watching were Matt LeBlanc’s close family.
The BBC made a huge mistake.
They tried to ape Jeremy Clarkson’s show except without the naughty humour. But it was the naughty humour that people liked.
And having sacked Clarkson for bullying, they then appointed Evans, who has a far worse reputation for that sort of thing.
Anyway, Evans said it was time to breathe in, breathe out and move on.
Do you think he has to tell himself to breathe, all the time?
Commiserations to Crabb
IT’S a great shame that Stephen Crabb has pulled out of the Tory leadership contest.
He’s a working-class bloke and would appeal to the millions of former Labour voters outside London who will never vote Labour again.
So who will get those votes, then?
If Ukip chooses wisely it’ll pick Paul Nuttall to replace Nigel Farage.
He’s a canny northerner and on the left of the party.
Meanwhile, I hope Farage enjoys his retirement.
Has any politician done more to change the shape of Britain in the past two decades?
We’ll miss him – have a few pints on me, Nige.
Sickly Swiddleston
LOOK, Hiddleston, you big sap. James Bond does not paddle in the sea with an inane smirk on his face. Wearing a T-shirt saying “I love TS”.
And with a mimsy heart tattoo on his arm, right.
What James Bond would do is cop off with Taylor Swift, sure. And then give her one. And then shoot her when he finds out she’s with the Russians.
And betray nothing more than a slightly regretful expression as he pulls the trigger.
Frankly, all those photographs of the two of them are beginning to make me gag.
Paloma's bum note
THE not-terribly-good singer Paloma Faith has been moaning.
She says pop stars are “scared” to talk about politics, because of the abuse they get.
Really? It seems to me they never shut up, spewing out half-baked idiocies and left-wing flopsy bunny toss.
Paloma, right, then went on to spew out some half-baked idiocies and left-wing flopsy bunny toss of her own.
About Brexit, natch. I’d tell you what she said but it’s so inane I’d fall asleep at my laptop.
Anyway, you’ve heard it all before from Bob Geldof or Damon Albarn or Billy Bragg or Chris Martin. All of whom managed to overcome their terror, the little poppets, to give us the benefit of their views.
Let's see more of Live Ade
CAUGHT the brilliant BBC Panorama report into why we voted for Brexit. It was presented by Adrian Chiles, back on his home turf of the Black Country.
The remarkable thing is there was none of the usual BBC sneering at working-class people – people being portrayed as bigots or xenophobes or racists.
Chiles let the locals speak for themselves – and discovered they were worried about the level of immigration.
Not worried about immigrants, just the LEVEL of immigration.
Panorama is easily the best BBC current affairs programme – and Chiles showed he was wasted talking gibberish on a breakfast sofa a few years back.
He’s an excellent reporter – let’s see more of him doing serious stuff.
Nuclear Wombles
DON’T make a habit of sharing my dreams with you. Other people’s dreams are incredibly boring.
But this one left me petrified and confused.
I dreamed I was in the middle of a nuclear attack. It was horrible and very realistic.
But the thing is, on the TV news just before the first missiles fell, they had a report from the enemy camp – the people who were trying to kill us all. And it was the bloody Wombles.
Uncle Bulgaria was telling the press he was going to wipe us all out.
And Orinoco was pressing the button. Where the hell did that come from? And what does it mean?
Nasty furry little psychopaths. Never liked them.
Rape horror
A GERMAN politician who was gang-raped by Arabic migrants lied to the police.
Leftie Selin Goren, herself a “refugee”, told the Old Bill the men spoke German.
She’s now admitted they were speaking Arabic or Farsi or Kurdish.
She lied so it wouldn’t be seen as a “racist” incident. Silly cow.
Meanwhile, Mumford & Sons have pulled out of a Swedish rock festival because of the number of women raped and sexually assaulted at it.
Again, immigrants, according to the women.
And Hungary is about to vote on whether or not it should let more than a hundred thousand migrants into the country.
Hmmm. I wonder what way they’ll vote?
It will be another nail in the coffin of the EU.
Miracle penis
ZORAN JURKOVIC is the man with the miracle penis. He was struck by lightning while out on his bike.
But his todger saved his life.
The bolt struck his helmet – I mean the one on his head – travelled down the wires from his headphones and exited his body via his old fella.
It missed his heart and internal organs completely. The Croatian is now recovering in hospital. And when he gets home and resumes normal marital life, his missus will light up like a Christmas tree.