Strictly star Ugo Monye reveals he’s split from his wife just days before new series starts
STRICTLY Come Dancing contender Ugo Monye has separated from his wife just days before the new series kicks off.
The split is a second devastating blow to the former England rugby union star following the death of his father from prostate cancer last week.
But brave Ugo, 38, refuses to pull out of the hit BBC1 dance show.
He insists taking part will provide the necessary “distraction” to help him come to terms with the loss.
Determined not to be tagged with the infamous “Strictly curse”, Ugo and Lucy, 32, his wife of five years, decided to go public with their split before Ugo filmed the pre-recorded launch show today.
Ugo said: “It’s been hard. At times things have seemed a bit overwhelming but it’s been a tough period for us both. In some relationships there is a moment, a ‘thing’, that breaks the couple.
“It can be an exterior influence. It can be anything. But with us it was a number of things. We weren’t in a volatile relationship, we never hated each other and there was no third party. Forget the Strictly curse — it’s the Covid curse! We ended up where we ended up.
‘Big conversation’
“It’s been a difficult, multi-faceted situation but there is no animosity. We’ve got two incredible young girls who we love so much.
“So our focus is very much on the kids, protecting and fostering this amazing family unit.
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“It will take more work, of course, but Lucy and I are in a good place. We’ve even been discussing the idea of going on holiday as a family next summer. Lucy is an amazing person and an incredible mum.”
The couple met through a mutual friend in 2014 and have two daughters — Phoenix, four, and Ruby, one.
Ugo moved out of the family home in West London a few weeks ago but the pair still tag one another in pictures on social media.
With divorce rates up in the pandemic, Ugo believes the enforced time spent together through lockdowns hastened the demise of his own marriage.
But he adds: “Though we are separating, we are still very much connected by our kids and we need to do what’s right for them. They came into his world because of a decision we made, so it’s really important we do everything to give them the best life possible.
“We’d had one big conversation a while ago when we put everything on the table, then smaller conversations about certain other things.
“So when the final decision to split was made, it wasn’t totally isolated or out of the blue.
“I haven’t told many friends because it means having that conversation — bringing it all up again, which is painful.
“We went to two kids’ birthday parties last weekend together and I don’t think anyone there could have guessed we had split.”
I’m definitely not thinking about romance
Ugo Monye on Strictly appearance
Ugo, who won 14 caps for his country, will find out today who his Strictly dance partner is. Over 18 previous series, the show — won last year by comedian Bill Bailey in front of 13million viewers — has led to several romances between celebs and pro dancers, while ending a number of marriages along the way.
But Ugo’s priorities are elsewhere.
“I’m not thinking about romance,” he says, looking mildly horrified by the idea.
“We have not started dancing yet but I am already lov- ing it. We have a WhatsApp group started by (fellow contestant) Dan Walker and everyone is buzzing. My dance experience is limited to nightclubs, bars and weddings — and with a Jagerbomb inside me I’m fantastic! But I’ve never had to cha-cha-cha before.
“Through all the bad times of late, it’s nice to have this ray of positivity and light — and the chance to wear some sequins!
“It’s the biggest show on telly, a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
“Strictly is a proper institution. And it’s almost taken on a greater meaning for me now.”
His dad Theo, who died last week, was a fan of the show. Ugo may have to miss rehearsal time for the funeral in Nigeria.
He says: “I spoke to him a few weeks ago, after it had been announced I was in the programme. He was in and out of hospital and had been in a lot of pain and had given up a little bit, I think — lost some of his fight.
“But he said, ‘Son, seeing you do this has given me a reason to keep on fighting. I’m so proud and I can’t wait for you to do it’.
“The contestants met on Zoom as a group for the first time last Wednesday and my dad passed away 30 minutes after that. I don’t really believe in serendipity but it’s like he fought so hard to get to that point.
“So it’s quite cool to be doing this, thinking about my dad, knowing it gave him a lease of life. I just wish it had given him longer.”
Now he is urging men to get checked for the deadly illness and hopes to reduce the stigma surrounding it. Ugo regularly gets tested. He says: “PSA kits cost £20 online and it’s a prick on the finger, a droplet of blood, not invasive at all.” The death of pop star Sarah Harding from breast cancer deeply affected him, he says, adding: “She was a year older than me. We understand the cycle of life, people die. But so many deaths are avoidable with a bit of information.
“Prostate cancer affects black people four times more than white people. It is the most common type of cancer (for men) but if detected early, one of the easiest to treat.”
‘It’s a disgrace’
Ugo displays the same eloquence and passion that make him such a respected rugby pundit as a campaigner for equality — “across the board, not just race”.
He has encountered racism first-hand and had to call the police last year after being abused in a shop.
He says: “I’ve had death threats, racist abuse and homophobic abuse, even though I’m straight. There’s no end to how far people will go to get a rise out of you. In the first lockdown I was in a supermarket and this white woman in her twenties racially abused my daughter and I. That was tough.
“I was caught between protecting my daughter and trying not to make a big deal of it while still standing up for myself.
“The saddest bit is that no one did anything despite everyone hearing it. This woman was harmless physically but her mouth wasn’t. Another woman told me after the incident how well I’d handled the situation. I asked her why she couldn’t stand up for me at the time. People are scared.”
Ugo reported the episode and was later told the abuser was “known to police”. Generously, he chose not to press charges because the woman had mental health issues.
But he made sure doctors spoke to her “because she needs protecting from herself”. He is currently in talks to set up a text hotline for people to report abuse more easily.
And on the subject of racial profiling, he says: “I remember being pulled over once when I was driving with my brother. I’d played for England at this point and had no points on my licence.
“I hadn’t been drinking and it was a sunny day, so all the windows were down. I showed them my driving licence and when the officer let me go, I said, ‘Well, that was a waste of time’.
“He replied, ‘Sorry, I couldn’t see who was in the car and presumed it was stolen’. It’s a disgrace. With number plate recognition he could have seen from 500 meters whether or not I had insurance.
“George Floyd’s murder was a huge trigger for me, for lots of things in my past.
“It has mobilised me to become more active fighting for equality. I don’t have an issue with the police. I just want to focus my energy on how I can make things better.”
Like millions, Ugo winced when he heard about Education Secretary Gavin Williamson confusing footie ace and anti-poverty activist Marcus Rashford with rugby union star Maro Itoje.
He says: “It happens so frequently. I’ve never heard anyone get Harry Kane confused with Owen Farrell. It doesn’t happen to white players. But if you don’t laugh, you cry.
“These are public figures that represent our nation. Look at (Foreign Secretary) Dominic Raab. When asked about taking the knee he said, ‘I think it’s something that comes from Game Of Thrones’ with a smirk on his face. The Foreign Secretary! Have some respect. How can he, as Foreign Secretary, not be educated enough to have an educated response about it?
“It’s not the gesture that’s divisive, it’s the words of people that head up our country. You’re constantly disappointed with people who should know better.”
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Back to TV, Ugo recently added to a glittering CV as a new captain on A Question Of Sport. With Paddy McGuinness now hosting, Ugo says: “Paddy’s my new TV husband. That’s quite cool.”
With a burgeoning bromance like that, no wonder Ugo has little time for the Strictly curse.
