EastEnders’ Whitney Dean condemns her wedding to Lee Carter with just one sentence

“TOMORROW is going to be the happiest day of our lives,” a misty-eyed Whitney Dean told Lee Carter on the eve of their wedding.

And with those words, she condemned them to either the wedding from hell. Or the life from hell. Because we all know that you can’t go around declaring happiness like that in Walford.

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The signs are all there. First up, she’s put Aunt Babe in charge of the cooking. No one should eat anything that comes out of her cauldron EVER, let along at a celebration. She’s already poisoned Morgan, who should have known better than ever setting foot in Walford again. Morgan mate, if you escape with your life, you’re one of the lucky ones.

Secondly, the guests are dropping like flies. Bianca can’t come because Patsy Palmer is living the life of Riley in LA she’s caught some kind of sickness bug.

Maid of Honour, Lauren [the irony isn’t lost on us] is also puking up somewhere.

Lady Di ate the wedding flowers. Which is probably the most surreal sentence a TV reviewer has ever written.

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Linda Carter [Kellie Bright] looks like she’s about to give birth at any minute – and she’s not even preggers.

So all in all, it’s not going brilliantly for Whitney – Shona McGarty – but at least no one is diving around in lakes, trying to drown their rapist brother. Yet.

Oddly, amongst all of this chaos, the thing that’s niggling Saint Johnny [Ted Reilly] the most, is that Lee [Danny-boy Hatchard] has taken out a loan to help fund the wedding. Err, welcome to the real world, Johnny.

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So the big day is tomorrow and while everything is pointing to the wedding being full of drama, we’re still hoping that Lee and Whit make it down the aisle and live happily ever after.

If they can stay together through trolling a dead girl, a pass at the sexy dad-in-law, a miscarriage and an STI, all of this is just small fry.

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