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EAU DEAR!

From smelling like Donald Trump to dabbing on Kim Kardashian’s perfume, we’re now turning up our noses at celebrity scents

As sales for celeb-backed smellies plunge, we look what's on offer and the daft descriptions that really do pong

composite scents

ONCE we went Gaga for celebrity perfumes – now we are turning our noses up at them.

UK sales of scents backed by stars from Britney to Bieber were down by 22 per cent last year, and over Christmas they plunged  42 per cent.

 It's not just the political establishment turning up its nose at President Trump
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It's not just the political establishment turning up its nose at President TrumpCredit: Splash News

Is it any wonder we are   saying “n’eau thanks” to celeb cologne — given the  naff names and cheesy claims that one dab will   “unlock the endless possibilities of believing in your dreams”?

Retail experts at NPD Group said the market   fell from £56.49million in 2015 to £44.2million in 2016.

They were   Trumped by  sales of  fragrances from  fashion houses such as Armani and Chanel, which were UP.

 Fashion-house brands such as Armani and Chanel are outselling the celebs' perfumes
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Fashion-house brands such as Armani and Chanel are outselling the celebs' perfumes

Teresa Fisher, of  NPD UK Beauty, says: “The decline in sales shows what customers are really looking for —  special scents that represent them.”

The top 5 celeb fragrances that DO still sell...

According to Groupon, the top five celebrity fragrances that ARE still selling are:
Instinct Gold Edition by David Beckham, £10.99
Heat by Beyonce, £10.99
Eau de Gaga by Lady Gaga, £10.99
Maui Fantasy by Britney Spears, £8.99
Lovely by Sarah Jessica Parker, £13.99

James Hammond, boss of Brand Doctor Consulting, added: “Celebrity fragrances are all about the stars who are endorsing them.

“I’m not at all surprised   women are moving back to designer labels. Like most things classical, they are always a safe bet.”

Here are some star smellies and the daft descriptions that really do pong.


KIM KARDASHIAN: PURE HONEY

They say: “It’s light and sweet but also powerfully seductive. As women we all have these dual natures. I created it to be delectable and crave-able, like all beautiful women are.”

Kim with Pure Honey
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Kim with Pure Honey

Pure Honey is sold as an “intoxicating and irresistible” blend that will draw people to you “like bees to blooms”.

A 100ml bottle costs £40.


BRITNEY SPEARS: COSMIC RADIANCE

They say: “The scent is inspired by a star which twinkles brighter than all other stars – a star of a distant galaxy, far away from this world.”

 Cosmic... that's Britney's scent
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Cosmic... that's Britney's scent

The composition of Britney’s Cosmic Glow includes “strong and optimistic citruses, with a refreshing, glittery red bouquet opening its fragrant petals”.

A 100ml bottle costs £18.71.


CALUM BEST: BEST by CALUM BEST

They say: “You will be surrounded by ladies in no time when they get a whiff of you in this suave and sophisticated men’s fragrance.”

 Calum Best with 'Best'
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Calum Best with 'Best'

The CBB housemate has since released other scents including Calum by Calum Best, Calum Best Gold Original  – and Only The Best perfume  for women.

A Best gift set is £12.99.

DONALD TRUMP: EMPIRE

They say: “Perfect for the confident man determined to make his mark with passion, perseverance and drive.”

 Smell like a Trump?
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Smell like a Trump?

The new   US President, who also   has a scent called Success, recommends his  Empire line: “For those who aspire to create their own empire through  personal achievement.”

A 50ml bottle  costs £35.49.


CHER LLOYD: PINK DIAMOND

They say: “The diamond is used as an iconic symbol for all of us to remember that no matter what others may say, we are all  special.”

 Cher offer Pink Diamond
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Cher offer Pink Diamond

The bright pink diamond bottle is certainly striking – so too is the drop in price.

Its recommended retail prize is £20, but the 50ml bottle can be found online for £8.


JUSTIN BIEBER: THE KEY

They say: “It channels Justin’s authentic voice that inspires his millions of  fans to believe – to believe in themselves, to believe in their connection with Justin, and most of all, to believe that their dreams will come true.”

 Has Justin Bieber got The Key to success with this perfume?
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Has Justin Bieber got The Key to success with this perfume?

The  fragrance also  “invites you to unlock the endless possibilities of believing in your dreams”. The 100ml women’s scent is £30.


LADY GAGA: FAME

They say: “Vanity can create a very cruel space for you if you don’t know how to manage it . . .  I have an interesting mind but I want to smell like a sl*t.”

 Are you Gaga for fame?
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Are you Gaga for fame?

The bottle’s “sexy ugly aesthetic” is designed to challenge the eye, a bit like Gaga herself. The floral and fruity fragrance within is an unusual black liquid.

A 100ml bottle costs £25.

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